Category: LOL CORNER

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Life of a Rebellious Daughter

steamed fish with mushrooms

Scenario # 3:

Sharing a homemade dinner prepared by me and my mother was my favorite childhood past time. I would get so immersed in the stories my mother would share, as a fisherman’s daughter. I remembered picking out the backbone of a steam fish with ginger scallion and soy sauce.

Mother: “Aiyah, my daughter! No, no. You don’t flip the fish over!”

Daughter: “Why? I need to flip to get the meat from the other side.”

Mother: “Bad luck, my daughter. That is the same as our fishing boat flip over and we drown.”

Daughter: “It’s only a fish, mama. We live on land now.”

Mother: “Just listen and remember, okay?”

Moral lesson: Being a fisherman’s daughter, according to my mother was not easy. Superstitions and traditions run deep in her upbringing as a child. She always wish blessings come to her family.

By Jazzmin S. Lu

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Life of a Rebellious Daughter

Scenario #2: Learning to prepare and cook an Asian style meal

Mother: “Aiyah! No, no! You cut the carrots too chunky and big! Whoever eat that will choke! You, not thinking!”

Daughter: “Ma, everyone in the family has healthy teeth. They could bite and chew longer.”

Mother: “How many times I tell you! Make food look good by cutting smaller pieces. You must learn to prepare and cook well, so you could attractive a future husband. Good food is the key to keep his heart and devotion to you. You are too young, don’t understand.”

Daughter: “Why? Really? What does that have to do with cutting carrots?”

Mother: “That is to prove you have some life skills as a future wife. No man would want you, my daughter if you don’t know how to please him.”

Daughter: “Why do I have to please him, when he could please me?”

Mother: “Keeping the peace is important, my daughter. One day, when you have a husband, remember my words.”

Moral lesson:

Traditional values are important and individuality are not glorified being raised by an immigrant mother. I admired her sincerity and always considered my future.

By Jazzmin S. Lu

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Life of a rebellious daughter

Scenario #1: Voicing your opinion

Immigrant Mother: “If you listen and do as I say, one day you will thank me for all that I am teaching you.”

Daughter: “But mother, I don’t want to learn to do these boring chores. Why are women stuck with household duties?”

Immigrant Mother: “One day, to marry a good husband, you must know.”

Daughter: “What if I don’t want to marry? If I do, I will have an independent husband that knows all these household duties.”

Immigrant Mother: “Daughter, your future husband would appreciate you more.”

Daughter: “Wouldn’t he appreciate me more if I make more money and hire a housekeeper?”

Immigrant Mother: “No, no …you silly daughter! You save money doing it yourself!”

By Jazzmin S. Lu

Moral lesson:

Sometimes we are stuck in a generational gap situation. Voicing your opinion to your immigrant mother is not a winning battle. She was raised by my traditional grandmother in a different era. Feminism doesn’t exist in her world.

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He Said, She Said (Beauty)

Scenario #4:

Betrayed by her partner and depressed from a stressful divorce, a woman in her fifties decided to make a visit to a plastic surgeon. She was tired of looking at the mirror daily with a reflection of a woman with a plain face. If only she could shine brighter and more beautiful than her partner’s mistress.

On the day of the visit and consultation, she browsed through photos of eyes, noses, lips and facial shapes through a catalog. She decided on big round eyes, a tall slender nose, medium lips and a heart shape face.

Surgeon: “Nice to meet you, Jane. How could I make you more beautiful today?”

Jane: “I have decided on all these features, could you fix me?”

Surgeon: “Whatever your heart desires, I am of your service. “

Jane: “Is there a warranty of some kind? “

Surgeon: “I could only give you a warranty of one year for the surgeries. After that, you could purchase extended warranties.”

Jane: “Okay, no problem. I am ready for a new “me” and a new transformation.”

After one month, Jane was very in love with her new look. She decided to move to a new town for a new start and even open her own flower shop. Every where she went, head turns toward her on the streets. She didn’t lack any attention from men because they came in packs daily to her flower shop.

One day, the man of her dreams came in to purchase flowers.

Man: “Hello, could you put together a bouquet of sunflowers for me? Today is my mother’s birthday and she loves sunflowers.”

Jane: “Sure, no problem. Have a seat and help yourself to free coffee and tea at the lobby.”

The man made himself a cup of coffee and sat at the lobby. He tried to be discreet and not stared too long at Jane. He was definitely shocked by her beauty and her sweet calm voice.

After twenty minutes, Jane walked over with the bouquet of arranged sunflowers. The man decided to ask, “I know this is a cheesy pick up line, I am captured by your beauty. Have we met before? Could I take you out on a date?”

Jane: “I don’t think we met before, I just moved her a month ago.”

Jane couldn’t resist this handsome man, either. She decided to say “yes” to a date.

Eleven months has passed. Jane found out this man, named Jerry was her ideal partner for life and found happiness again. One day, she tripped and fell on the sidewalk after dark and was knock unconscious. While in the state of shock, she screamed and yelled, “Please fix me, I don’t want to be the old “me”. She opened her eyes and Jerry was holding her hands.

Jerry: “What’s wrong, my love? You will be alright, you had a concussion and have to rest here in the hospital for a few days.”

Jane: “Jerry, please bring me a mirror! “

Jerry: “No, my dear. The doctor wrapped your face due to horrible damage to your nose. You may need to see a plastic surgeon.”

Two weeks has passed, recovery was painful to Jane. Luckily, her warranty didn’t expire and no fee to fix her nose and lips. She was devasted that the surgeon could only fix her broken nose cartilage with a visible slight dent. She ignored Jerry’s phone calls and texts, drowned in her self- pity.

One day, Jerry decided not to be ignored. He went to her house and pounded on her door.

Jane opened the door and looked sadly into Jerry’s eyes. Jerry was shocked and didn’t recognize her with her new look.

Jerry: “Hi, I am looking for Jane. Is she home?”

Jane: ” I am Jen, her sister. Jane is out of town and I am house sitting for her.”

Jerry walked back to his car and stopped on his tracks. In his mind and gut, Jen looks and sound familiar. He pounded on the front door again.

Jerry: ” Jane, is that you? I remember your voice. You don’t have a sister. Why do you want to avoid and lie to me?”

Jane: “Jerry, I can’t. I look like an ugly duckling. Let’s break up.”

Jerry: “Jane, I admit I fell in love with your external beauty in the beginning, but I love also your inner beauty. You are the sunshine and the moon that lights my life. Your sweet calm voice and crackling jokes brings me laughter daily. Please don’t turn me away, I want to marry you.”

Jane: “Will you still love me, if I told you that I had a complete facial make over? “

Jerry: “Yes, just be honest with me from here on.”

Moral lesson:

External beauty is only skin deep. Internal beauty is also important in search of self-love, joy and happiness. Temporary fixes buys us short term but not long term happiness. We may all have painful past experiences, but we must learn to move forward with a new transformation, just like a butterfly. Don’t sell your soul to any human or unnatural being.

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He Said, She Said (Wealth)

Scenario #1:

There was once a man in his thirties. He was lucky to be born to a rich and well- known family. All the ladies swoon over him because of his chisel handsome face that resembles the statute of David.

One day, he attended a friend’s housewarming party high up in the hills of the rich and famous. From the corner of his eye, he spotted the woman of his dreams all alone at the open bar. He decided to approach her with a charming smile.

Man: “Hello, I am Chad. Would you grace me with your beautiful self and dance with me?”

Woman: “No, I don’t dance. I am here to enjoy a nice cocktail while waiting for my friend.”

Man: “Come on, don’t be a spoil sport. Do you know who I am?”

Woman: ” I don’t know, should I care?”

Man: “Just for your information, my family owns half of this town.”

Woman: “Wait…let me get this through my head. Your family owns half of this town? Really?”

Man: “Yes, and you should be honored that I am speaking to you casually.”

Woman: “Who are you really? What do you own free and clear? Without your family and wealth, could you survive on your own? Is your name worthy of my respect?”

Man: “Woman, you are too sassy! I feel sorry for whomever pursues you as a girlfriend or wife!”

Woman: “Don’t worry for me because I am waiting for someone special that will love me for my defiance, independence and intelligence.”

Moral lesson:

Not all humans are impressed with wealth and fame. Wealth is not always worldly possessions or a title to a name. Wealth could be in forms of, self-love, knowledge, and enlightment.

By Jazzmin S. Lu

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